First let’s start with Commitment. You joined a house. YOU joined a house. You saw qualities in a group of people that caused you to want to spend your hard earned money, your precious time, and your spare energy to help upkeep their image. Yes I said YOUR resources and yes you must help upkeep what you found to be attractive about them. That’s the one thing that we all forget: the sense of commitment. When you join a house, you must look at it like joining a little league team. This is your team that you will practice with, encourage, uplift and hopefully win alongside of. Don’t look at it as joining a MLB team where you sign on for three years, consider yourself a huge commodity then trade to a new team for more money. If what made the house alluring in the first place is no longer present, what are you willing to do to fix it?
That brings me to Support. Much like a real house, it takes upkeep to maintain the appearance of opulence. Each member has a role, serves a purpose and has a responsibility. When members leave or grow dormant, their purpose goes unfulfilled and slowly adds wear and tear to the house. Others must step in and continue the work to keep the house running smoothly. If you feel like your house isn’t running smoothly; look at how your actions can correct the issue. Are you maintaining contact with parents for information? Are you keeping communication with your brothers/sisters? Are you attending get-togethers/balls/meetings? Are you paying your dues? Are you practicing? Are you walking? Are you being a cheerleader? Are you of any use to the house at all? You should have said yes to all those questions to be considered a functioning member of the house. You can feel it when large amounts of members all answer no to them. The house doesn’t run smoothly. I mentioned earlier that it takes YOUR resources to help upkeep a house image. It does. It takes money to travel to different states for balls, for hotel stays and transportation, for entrance fees, for effects, for outfits… It is not paid for by the house. You must tap into your pockets to pay for that. Be responsible for yourself. Find your own source of support.
Next is Pride. As a new kid, you’re ecstatic to be the new [enter house name here] but do you still feel that way after a year? Your first chop/loss? Your first upset? When they add a new kid to the roster? Or a new kid who walks your category? You should. Even if you think the new face child doesn’t has face, you should be proud to belong to the house. Help the child give the face they should. Instill in them a sense of pride by showing them the support they deserve and building up their self-esteem. [Nice lead-in huh?]
Categories are never won by insecure, shy, socially inept people. They are won by those who can ruffle their feathers proud like a peacock. Self-esteem and confidence is essential to being in a house. You must be confident enough to stand tall while allowing yourself to be judged. Judged by the panel, by the spectators and even judged by your very own house siblings. Yes, don’t be confused. They all don’t see you. It may be shade; it may be personal opinion, but you won’t be the best in everyone’s eye. The leaders of the house are responsible for building up self-esteem in their kids. They cannot focus one on one with each one constantly though. As brother & sisters, you must pick up the slack. Help a runway girl find the right shoes. Research costumes for a realness kid. Buy moisturizer for the face girl. Help each member be their best and build a stronger foundation of respect.
How could you want to sabotage the person who helped you get prepared for a Ball? Helped you practice? Made you feel attractive? Built your reputation? You couldn’t if you had respect for them. Respect is not wanting to cause any harm to them. Emotionally, verbally and physically. If each member, titled or not, are pulling their own weight and maintaining their responsibilities, how could they not respect one another? Having respect is comforting in a house setting and solidifies house loyalty.
Loyalty is standing by someone through thick and thin and maintaining all the aforementioned things with them. (No fair weather friends here, folks!) This is the hardest condition to keep because we don’t always agree on things. We don’t always see eye to eye. Arguments happen and grudges are hard to erase. You have to admit humility at times and boast proudly at others. Picking your battles and respecting the decisions of the leaders is being loyal. Don’t be discouraged in conflict and find a way out. Maintaining loyalty is appreciating your role in the grand scheme and never losing sight of that. Once each member has reached this state of bliss… You see - Unity.
Unity is what the outside world sees. It is the combination of all of the above working in sync. In my personal opinion, this is the shiny aura that people see when looking to join a house. It is the glow that stands houses out from the rest on paper and at a ball. Its something we all want and can’t seem to obtain. Here’s my recipe kids… Don’t let it go to waste.
Xoxo
Roxi
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